almost okay

Dear Lyzako,

The first full week of summer finds us still cooler than average here in southeast lower Michigan, the high today predicted to reach only into the middle seventies. There's also a lingering chance of showers that threatens to put a damper on the annual Independence Day fireworks display which takes place tonight on the Detroit River.

As you well know, the timing of the fireworks is designed to recognize both the Canadian and the U.S. holidays, so it falls awkwardly early to be thought of as a Fourth of July party here. Nevertheless, the show goes on. The event (now a part of the new River Days Festival) draws millions of slack-jawed, gun-toting spectators, and in addition to recognizing the two international holidays, ushers in the start of summer as well.

I avoided the downtown area over the weekend, which was when the River Days Festival actually started, preferring to keep to myself after a long week of difficult work that left me tired and sore, my right hand numb and pained from overuse to the point where I could barely grip a can of beer.

Notice: I said 'barely'.

For my part, I planned to begin the summer with a simple meal cooked outside, washed down with as many cans of said beer as seemed necessary to both alleviate my aches and pains and inspire a summery mood. Since I was hungry for some good-old down-home barbecue, I made a beeline to Ferndalia Foods on Sunday and picked up a couple thick slabs of ribs, along with all the spices necessary for my super secret dry rub.

There's nothing like the scent of charcoal in the air, and the accompanying odor of charred meat as it wafts into the nostrils and wraps its saliva-inducing bouquet around a hungry heart (by way of the stomach, of course). For we fellow carnivores, it's a defining summertime moment.

After my grocery shopping, I primed the beer-drinking pump with two tall Blue at BW3, then home by four, the ribs gently smoking as the sun sank below the trees. I continued to down Blues as the pig flesh roasted until my right hand no longer pained me. In fact, somewhere around can number seven, I wasn't even sure it was my hand anymore.

And the ribs were fantastic! For side dishes I had some grilled Cubanelle peppers and baked a pan of mac and cheese right over the coals.

As to the fireworks display...

Well, it's been years since I actually attended the annual event, the hordes of people at ground level making the entire process a difficult and often dangerous proposition at times. I don't plan on going tonight, either. While attending the fireworks in the past, I've seen bloodied faces, been pushed and threatened, and one time was nearly run down by speeding traffic as it rushed from Jefferson onto the I-375 ramp. At least one poor soul gets beaten and/or shot nearly every year, and I don't relish the thought of being another victim of celebratory violence.

No, I'd much prefer to watch from the comfort of my basement as the lovely and ageless Carmen Harlan hosts the live broadcast on Channel 4. I'll read about the stabbings tomorrow.

Happy Holiday(s)!
Marty Sherman

OLD MAN SHERMAN'S SAVORY SPARE RIBS

Super Secret Dry Rub:

One 3 oz. container (approx. six tbsp.) chili powder
One tbsp. ground cumin
One tbsp. ground black pepper
One tbsp. hot Hungarian paprika
One-half tsp. cayenne pepper
Two tbsp. coarse salt
One tsp. garlic powder
One tsp. onion powder
One tsp. Cajun seasoning

-This should make enough rub for a couple slabs, but if you're short, just make more. I like to keep some in a shaker and use it on chicken, too. These proportions aren't carved in stone, so have fun with it and make the dish your own, but don't get too carried away with changing it. For example, I wouldn't recommend reversing the ratio of chili powder to cayenne unless you have a very sturdy digestive system.

-To prep ribs: Place slabs meat side down and remove white membrane that runs along the back sides of each. This is an important step! If you find the membrane too slippery to grip, use paper toweling to get it started. It should pull off in a single piece if you're steady and patient.

-Place ribs in a large plastic bag and apply dry rub while wearing latex gloves. Start with the meat side but be sure to cover front and back thoroughly.

-Soak several hickory chunks in hot water for at least forty-five minutes. A couple of good handfuls should be enough. When coals are hot, place on one side of grill only, leaving half the grilling surface for placement of the ribs. I use a Weber kettle grill and a rib rack that holds each slab on its side when bent into a U shape. Situate the ribs in the rack on the side of the grill away from the coals, place wood chunks directly on hot coals and replace lid tightly, adjusting the airflow so that the vent is only half-open.

-Do not remove lid for at least ninety minutes! Resist the urge to even touch it! It's important that the fire dies down to a slow burn and the smoking and cooking evolve at a leisurely pace. Every time you feel the urge to look and see what's up, have another beer, just make sure you don't pass out. Your patience will be rewarded with some of the tenderest, juiciest ribs your tongue has ever experienced.

-Sauce them if you must (make your own from scratch or use a commercial brand), but dry is the way to go. The rub supplies plenty of flavor without the added mess. Enjoy!